seasonal clash

…in the best way.

why the water was still on
at train park this morning,
i’ll never know
[this being sept 28th + all],
but
hot dog

and
jump in.

(yes, we’re in long sleeves.
because it’s fall.
but if the sprinkler wants
to pretend it’s still summer,
far be it from us
to argue.)

let’s be frank

conrad + whitney [frank], that is.

it’s ripping my heart right out
to let the vibrant mr. + mrs. frank
go.

they’ll end up in idaho,
after 3 months in southeast asia.

with passionate charades like that,
you can see why his team won the game.

[we were passionate, too,
don't get me wrong.]

exhibit A.
late saturday evening,
3 grownups in the chair

exhibit B.
mere hours later,
4 not-so-grown-ups in the chair.

those chairs just invite snuggling.

ps -
c + w,
we’re so excited about your future
and we send you off with prayers
[and tears]
and a vision for what God will do
in and through you two;
the next community that gets you
doesn’t know what’s going to hit them.

luckyducks.

i’m trying hard to be optimistic
about this whole leaving-thing.

loveyou.

on communication

three tips for good communication
with your kids,
your colleagues,
you name it.

thank you, yet again, turansky/miller.

‘learn how to start

‘the way you present an issue often determines the response.
sometimes it’s best to address a problem immediately,
while other times waiting a few hours is more appropriate.
wisely choose a time, place, and approach with the goal
of not just rebuking, but correcting, and finding resolution.

“kari jo, I’d like to talk about the way you treated me earlier.
is now a good time or should we talk after dinner?”

learn when to stop

‘once a dialogue has developed,
have discernment to know when to stop.

’some parents feel like they must win an argument
or come to resolution by the end of the conversation
so they end up pushing too hard. other times emotions get too involved.

’still other parents end a simple correction with
preaching, bringing up the past, or
making exaggerated statements about the offense.

‘in any case, it’s important for parents to
know when to take a break or simply stop the conversation.

“i think we better stop here. things are getting pretty tense.
we need to continue this conversation, but let’s take a break for now.
maybe we’ll think of some other ideas in the meantime to help resolve this problem.”

‘learning when to stop during conflict is a very important skill.

‘learn how to listen

‘conflict represents opportunity. children watch parents
handle conflict and observe how they resolve differences.
listening and affirming a young person’s thinking
is an honoring step in conflict management.

“i understand you’d discipline your sister differently.
your ideas make sense. at this point, I have to make the decision
and I’m going to emphasize something different, but I appreciate your ideas.”

‘affirming or validating a child’s thinking or
reasoning is helpful for their development.

‘as you dialogue, you must learn to tolerate criticism.
many discussions you have will open the door for others to criticize you.

‘don’t feel threatened or take these jabs personally.
use them to discuss issues and explain your decisions.

‘if you can be transparent enough to use yourself as an example,
your children will learn much more about life.’

apparently i dress my children
to match my carpet.

renew

a vision,
a hope,
a city.

REN3W Vision Campaign from Redeemer Video on Vimeo.

kick back

central park,
north meadow,
field d.

hot ref

no. 4’s cheering section;
thanks, friends.

he loved having his buddies
on the sideline;
they had just finished their games
in adjacent fields.

adam’s in blue + eli’s in red.

watchme,daddy,watchme!

soho saunter

that’s the trinket i picked up
@ dean + deluca,
a molinilla.

you turn it upside down into
your steaming cup of hot chocolate
and roll the stem btwn your palms
to froth the chocolate.

you’re coming over, right?

process-orientation

concept no. 29 in my
101 things i learned
in architecture school book
is frequently helpful to me as a parent:

[substitute 'parent' for 'designer'
and 'family' for 'design']

‘no. 29:

being process-oriented,
not product-driven,
is the most important + difficult skill
for a designer to develop.

‘being process-oriented means:

1. seeking to understand a design problem
before chasing after solutions;

2. not force-fitting solutions to old problems
onto new problems;

5. making design decisions conditionally–
that is, with the awareness that they
may or may not work out
as you continue toward a final solution;

7. accepting as normal the anxiety that comes
from not knowing what to do;

9. always asking, ‘what if…?’ regardless of
how satisfied you are with your solution.’

thank you, matthew f.

some people i know

you know who you are,
chick-fil-a addicts.

first day of preschool

we’ve been a part of
co-op preschool for years now,
but this our first year with
this happy new group
of friends.

(old friends,
new grouping;
it’s always sad when the kiddos
grow up and go to school.)

hooray for preschool.

waiting excitedly.

that london bridge
keeps falling.

loving every last second
of having her friends here.

*sigh*

goodbye until next week, preschool friends;
we can’t wait.

ps -
i feel the need to take a little
turn down preschool-memory lane:

ethan, henry, houston, abby r, and lucas,

and
mitch, daniel, hank + benjamin,

and
jane, abby t, caroline,
kathryn, isabella + betsy,

and
laura, hannah, wilson,
maya, cash…

and soon margaret + cecil
will have their time in the sun.

oh, i see the goodness of the Lord
in the faces of these children.

pps -
we read anatole
at the end.

one of my tiptopfavorite children’s book.

coming in a close second this week
on the endearing-scale:

miss bindergarten gets ready for kindergarten.

what a sweet woman, that miss b.

. henry philip .

happy birthday
to our laugh-y seven year old;

we’re crazy.
i mean,
we’re crazy about you, love.

we’re all about
front-door decorations.

(too bad i broke my
wide-angle lens, eh?

everything is quite
sucky-in-y w/ the zoomer on)

nathan

(he’s going to be surprised when he
comes home from school;
ezra drew him this awesome scorpion boy
birthday picture that i taped to the
front door, as well.
supercool, ez.)

‘henry’ and ‘caroline’ fivel-style

thanks, grammy + papa.

your daddy cried happytears
when you were born, love.

as i gave him that last out-the-door snuggle,
i snuck this little sticker on his back
so his teachers + friends would remember;

i wonder if it’ll still be on there
when i pick him up in a minute?

happy bday, henry.

so i was distracted

cory gave me the best present on tuesday,
taking cheerfulbetsy to the
preschool at his office
so i could spend the day
kicking around with my brother.

we met in union square,
conversation, coffee and
even a movie*;
a perfect new york day.

what fun to take scott on
his inaugural visit to the strand,
to boot.

while there, i scooped up
two books for birthdayboyhenry +
a fun new strand bag for myself;
the cates fam loves
a good strand bag.

exhibit A:

cute little george sprott.

it wasn’t until
i got home later on
that i realized
the back side of the bag
was sporting a different design
than the front.

oops.

scandalous exhibit B:

well,
i can’t be sporting that now,
can i.

so i hit
little miss centerfold
with a chic
little black dress
compliments of
little mr. sharpie
+
voila,

tote bag redemption.

*we saw the informant.
weird-o-weird.
not what i was expecting.

matt damon kills it,
totally rocks the role.

still a strange show.

loved being there with my little brother, though.

shoot,
we could’ve gone toilet paper shopping
and i still would’ve loved it.

loveyou,swh.

from sunny california

guess who
is in town?

congrats, morgen + rankin.
(and grandma carole + grandpa glen + uncle david.)

central park ladies.

cloudy w/ a chance of silly

8:02am
why wouldn’t we all sit
in the same chair?

(spot henry?)

8:03am
happy betsy leaves on an outing with her
Main Man.

planting bean fields.
we’re addicted.

on big hair

and,
‘on why facebook is killing me’

my funniest friend, ambria,
just posted these big-hair-doozies.

don’t worry, a,
i’ll go dig some photographic
dirt on you, love.

exhibit a.

‘pass the aussie spray+scrunch, ladies‘

and

‘where’s the boy from north, cory cates?
you know, matt’s friend?
what do we know about him?
he’s Super Cute.‘

i don’t have words
for how big my hair
is right there.

but i sure do love those three girls.

listen, who am i kidding:

given today’s humidity in new york,
if i glanced in a mirror rightthisminute,
my hair might look
scarily similar
to this circa. 1992 photo.

oye.

and pass the aussie.

(well, devachan these days;
same curls,
different product.)

vs.

business time

mondays in apt 1 are super
un-sexy.

this apt takes a beating over
the weekend as all six of us
are enjoying ourselves +
playing with all of our
respective toys + friends
and eating what seems like
one hundred meals…

this place is ready for some serious
fire hose treatment
come monday morning.

whew

so if i do monday well,
the rest of the week is a pleasure.

if i do monday poorly
(or refuse to do what monday requires),
i might as well
pound a hammer on my thumb
because that’s how the rest
of the week is going to feel.

paige was the one who gave me
some genius insight 2-ish yrs ago
when we were brainstorming how
the Lord’s day should actually be
a break from our duties/roles that define us,

but as a mother of young children
how could that really happen?

meals, clean-up, clothes, laundry,
the show must still go on.

she suggested letting a few things ‘go’
on sunday and then building in
extra time on monday to pick up the
pieces from sunday + also to do
monday’s normal work.

genius.
i should put her on payroll
and keep those gems a comin’.

so this is the 3rd year that
my calendar is zipp-o clear
on monday
(during school hrs, that is -
from 8:30am to 2:50pm)
so we get
down to business.

serious props to betsyboo who
hung with me while i did
all of the tedious-but-imperative
laundry/bedding/towels/floors/
fridge wipe-down/kitchen blast-with-a-fire-hose
(aka. mrs meyer’s lavendar scented fantasticness)
and was oh-so-cheerful as we
hit fairway and schlepped a
week’s worth of (scrumptious) groceries
home and put them away.

double-whew.

my favorite part of today
(besides getting to see some of the cho’s)
was when b looked up from her
barbies at me, ironing boy’s button downs,
and reminded me,

‘everything we have is a
gift from the Lord.’

amen, lovey, amen.

‘praise be to the Lord,
to God our Savior,
who daily bears our burdens.’

psalm 68:19

hotdog + pass the scrub brush, baby.

head-to-head settling

that’s right,
we were running
two tables of settlers
after church last night.

lisa, conrad, whitney, bethany, jay + i
and
michael, emily, nathan + cory.

whitney and cory cleaned house.
so we put them head to head for
the second match +
whit blew us all out of the water.

duck on a bike;
love that crazy guy.

ps -
happy birthday, bethany!

whirly birds

we can’t thank scott enough
for taking the boys to jfk
to see his helicopters.

and by ‘his’ i mean ‘taxpayers’
so actually, ‘yours’.

coolest.job.ever.

thank you.

(and then someone might’ve
won at settlers. again.
i digress.)

‘white top’, vh-3.

cory said the boys could’ve stayed in
the cockpit of this bird for hours.

nathan said it was
‘the best day of his life.’

(security mandates no photos
are allowed inside the birds
or even if the doors are open.
yessir.)

all photocredits: swh

scott’s helmet

‘green top’, vh-46, aka. phrog.

all of their inside-and-outside action
on the helicopters was
closely (very closely) monitored by
an armed security person.

one of the first things they told me
about the experience?

the candy.

apparently the president likes candy.
or his staff likes candy.
or someone wants him to have
candy available at all times.
(i doubt the presidential dentist likes this,
right, whit?)

starburst, mints-in-presidential-wrappers,
gum, + snickers.

oh, and the gum (extra) was in
red, white + blue wrappers and
all of the packages were arranged
into the shape of an american flag.

we’ll try that at home.

fratellino

the happiest threesome ever =
my little brother,
my betsy
and me;
catching up + enjoying the neighborhood
on this pictureperfect early-fall day.

nathan tries to lure uncle scott
into the backyard leafburners club.

ps -
prettyplease try to run into us today if you can,
i’d love to introduce you to scott.

since he + katie lived in japan for so long
and so recently moved back stateside,
it’s surprising how few of you have
met my sweet brother.

we ran into diane, jane + laura
and amilee this morning,

as well as sara + deb t.,
well, they were hanging out of a cab waving
so it’s not like he really got to ‘meet’ them,
but i’m giving it partial credit.

pps -
cory, nathan, henry + caroline
rode their bikes down (and back)
to the high line this morning.

the entertainment report:
two thumbs up.

the first aid report:
all four of them had a
bike wreck of some sort
or another
(though they all came home
with big smiles,
all’s well that...).

my favorite was cory’s:
he turned around to see how
caroline was doing and
basically fell into his
own bike.

nice.

(and sayonara to all of the
skin on his shin-y shin shin.)

pick-a-brick

this morning we felt the need to
dump out all of our lego buckets
and
re-sort +
re-categorize.

and we really wanted to locate
all of our elusive yellow diamonds
that hide at the bottom of the buckets.

betsy’s job assignment from the boys:
’shiny’ ones.
look for the shiny ones.

change it up

this was one of those
change it up*
mornings
spiritually,
scripturally.

from the moment
my feet hit the [cold] floor,
i needed to
watercolor.

so as my family slept,
i turned on a bitsybit of light @ the desk,
fastened together
some simple cardstock,
painted
and
then filled the tree
with the bits of scripture
that have been rolling around
in my head
convicting + comforting me
this week.

His Word is our food
and our life.

and a watercolored scripture-y tree
in the wee hours of a saturday morning,
apparently.

i particularly like luke 18:1,
then Jesus told his disciples
a parable to show them that
they should always pray
and not give up.

ps -
who knows what tomorrow’s
change-it-up will hold,
a macrame pouch for my prayer cards?

replete with beading,
of course.

pps -
my brother’s in town
until late next week.
how great is that?!

(sorry to steal him away, katie + gracie;
we love you.)

* in lieu of just grabbing my
biblebag + curling up w/
the usual tea, scripture + prayer fare;

don’t you find that an extended
time of confession+repentance
or
a morning of hymn singing
or
exclusively focusing on scripture memory
just helps things along sometimes?

brings out the hidden +
refreshes the stuffiness?

i could be wrong,
but it certainly brings me
fresh perspective at times.

change it up,
indeed.

ppps -
maybe don’t mention my
settlers win last night
to emily + cory;

they might be a bit sore about it.

(yessssssss.)

firestarters

the boys like to keep their
magnifying glasses
tucked in their back pockets
during the fall season.

you never know
when or where
you’re going to find that
perfect
leaf.

to burn, that is.

see the face?

he finds the crispy leaves out back +
brings them out front
for the direct sunshine.

nathan + his junior associate.

safety officer’s note:

our pocket magnifiers are too weak
to actually start a proper fire,
just smoldering smokey-ness.

which is right up our alley.

foodie hooky

yep,
we might’ve
played hooky from life today
to watch the culinary
ms. ray tape
two consecutive shows.

snacks were served,
whew.

rachael taught
amy, bethany, tracy + i
(and a few others)
how to make
bleu cheese burgers +
armadillo potatoes.

far left side, fourth row back.

(i’m the tilted head
to the right of tracy.

but don’t actually try to
locate us in the photo;
it’s too confusing.)

life 101

oh, caroline learned the
saddest little lesson
this morning.

today being wednesday,
both she and betsy
woke up + from the first minute
were talking about mom’s group.

should i bring this toy,
should i wear this dress,
will jj be there?

gulp.

cory broke it to her gently,
but her heart took it like a
category five hurricane
(read: catastrophic).

what?
no mom’s group?

unthinkable.
unimaginable.

kindergarten-schmindergarten,
she’d rather go to mom’s group.

ouch.

i liked her lesson yesterday better:

after school she said,
‘why does [boy A] keep following
me around All Day Long?’

that’s sometimes how boys say,
‘i want to be friends’
sweetie.

ps -
i was so pleased when
cory agreed to her plea bargain
that she could go to mom’s
group sometime this year +
i’d just take her to school
afterwards.

whew.

five important questions

sunday was a uniquely spectacular day.

in the morning,
five people that we love
Very Much
answered
five very important questions
in front of the entire
church congregation.

three cheers for God’s work in
elena,
abby,
toby, +
zach’s lives.

(and, of course, our beautifulpatti, too)

l to r: zach, elena, toby, patti, + abby
(along with another couple (left)  +
three families (right) bringing
two baby sophie’s + a baby garrett)

proud papa sauls bringing his girls
into the church
(along with the entire group)

they each introduced themselves
and told why they wanted to join the church;
okay, if i wasn’t tearywithgratitude before,
this totally sunk me.

i almost heard angels singing.

and at the 5pm service,
bethany became a member.
(and joanna, janie, and 2 others)

you know we had a big ol’ party afterwards.

yay, b;
we love you.

c, b + i made, oh, 60+ cupcakes
for the after party.

party on, betsyboo.

the five questions they were asked
to give their verbal assent to
(aka. pca membership vows):

1. do you acknowledge yourself
to be a sinner in the sight of God,
justly deserving His displeasure,
and without hope, except in His Sovereign mercy?

(thanks be to God for Christ’s completed work
as i so ‘justly deserve his displeasure’.)

2. do you believe in the Lord Jesus Christ
as the Son of God, and Savior of sinners,
and do you receive and depend upon Him alone
for your salvation as He is offered in the Gospel?

(‘receive’ and ‘depend’,
inhale, exhale.)

3. do you now resolve and promise,
in humble reliance upon the grace of the Holy Spirit,
that you will endeavor to live as becomes a follower of Christ?

4. do you promise to support the Church
in its worship and work to the best of your ability?

5. do you promise to submit yourself to the
government and discipline of the church,
and promise to pursue its peace and purity?

there’s almost nothing i love more
than doing a membership interview
with my cory +
having the pleasure of hearing first-hand
God’s active work in someone’s life,
esp if they’re someone we know well
and have watched Him work.

’some trust in chariots and
some trust in horses,
but we trust in the
name of the Lord our God.’
psalm 20:7

‘we give thanks to you, O God;
we give thanks, for your name is Near…’
psalm 75:1

ps -
uncle, uncle,
you’ve twisted my arm.

i can hear your demanding voice
all the way from here,
‘where are the recent photos of
lucy in sunny ca?!’

i simply
must
post a few…

lu w/ the times;
you can take the girl out of new york,
but you can’t take the new york
out of the girl.

(‘incredulous at the standard of public debate
over health care reform’,
of course)

she’s looking very big-sisterly,
don’t you think?
(wink, wink)

oh, lulu, we love you.

and miss you
something terrible.

oops, i did it again

i hate it when i do that.

here’s how it played out
in apt 1 earlier this afternoon:

1. situation A is escalating.

(eg. henry’s excited playtime voice is
growing louder by the nanosecond.

‘hen, ssshhhhh, kiddo.
keep it down.’)

2. situation A continues to escalate
and reaches terrifying heights.

(eg. after a sustained period
of imaginative play,
henry’s l.o.u.d. play-voice feels like
it’s inside my brain.

‘henry!
please.keep.it.down.’)

3. situation B presents itself
and
*boom*

i nail it with all of the
frustratedsteam that
was building inside of me
in response to situation A.

(eg. nathan showed up in flip-flops
when he was supposed to be
donning suitable-for-cub-scouts footwear
so we could skedaddle pronto.

‘WHYareYOUwearingFLIPflops??!!’
spoken like it’s the
End of the World As We Know It.)

oops.

major oops.

nathan dissolved into frustrated tears,
completely surprised at the
level of my disappointed response,

‘why are you so mad
about my flip flops, mom?’

as tears streamed down his face.

oh,
i so blew it.

and God, in his great mercy,
pointed it out instantly
through the tearful face
of my favorite 10 year old.

now, hours after my hugs and verbal apologies,
after everyone else is asleep,

my heart is still quite in the
pit of my stomach,

but my spirit is deeply encouraged
that our graceful God
meets me in my failure and,
in his kindness,
leads me to repentance.

and as i pass by the kids’
shoe shelf over the next few days and
see those cute big boy flip flops sitting there,

my heart will
want to condemn me,

but i’ll remember that God’s grace
frees me
because He paid the penalty himself
in the careful obedience of our Lord Jesus.

now,
about henry’s volume….

crafty

today’s to-do list had some
rather silly line-items, including:

refill pompom + wiggly eye drawers, check.

we sure love a good after-school craft project;
come on over, ya hear?

ps -
kisses to sara (+ renee)
for taking betsyboo on a
girly outing this afternoon.

can you say magnolia?
and sephora?
and a girls-only lunch?

she came home with a daisy
(she insisted i tuck it behind my ear),

new lipgloss
(i’m so tempted to swipe it for myself;
quiz me next week to see if i held off),

and the Most Delicious lemonade
(i’m sneaking sips when she’s distracted).

thanks, friends;
both she + i needed that.

on being left

at least the first part
of this year is going
to be tough.

after a cheerful morning together,
four of our favorite people
get all gussied up,
teethy brush-eyd,
spit-spot-sparkling clean
and
then
they
leave
us.

and by ‘us’,
i primarily mean
‘betsy’.

it’s been a rough go of it, so far.
being left-behind, that is.

yesterday, after a good bit of
tearful clinging-to-my-leg she finally
articulated this bit:

‘i need caroline.
i need caroline!’

i pray the Lord will comfort her
and that instead of my being
her consolation (booby?) prize,
i could actually be a
consolation to her.

sorry, knucklehead henry,
you did that face to yourself.

cory gives the ol’
hi-ho-and-out-we-go.

and poor betsyboo
begins the long wait
until 2:51pm,
the Reunion Moment,
as it were.

‘cast all your cares
on the Lord
and he will
sustain
you.’

psalm 55:22

ps -
i don’t know if this is appropriate
for posting,
but it’s cracking me up:

we really like the ridiculous rhyme,
‘i see london, i see france…’

and this morning,
nathan launched this one on us:

i see church
and
i see nuns,
i see daddy’s
giant
buns!

pps -

she’s done some version of this
every school day so far,
waiting on the patio and peering into
the morgan’s apartment until she
sees laura, desperately trying
to get her attention.

laura!
laura!

hey, friend!

our newly-minted five year old

happy birthday, caroline belle cates.

‘rejoice in the Lord always.
i will say it again: rejoice!
let your gentleness be evident to all.
the Lord is near.

…and the peace of God,
which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and
your minds in Christ Jesus.’

philippians 4:4-5, 7

painting plaster ponies,
say that 3x fast.

oops,
don’t tell cory we used his
yankees shirts as painting smocks,
he sort of files that under
’sacriligious’.

lisa, meghan + emily,
my cheerful co-hosts;
thank.you.so.much.

brennan

jane

isabella

kavita

karis

ye olde birthday bounce house

this ol’ thing has served us so well;
it just tucks under the bunk bed when deflated +
has rescued many a cooped-up wintry day
for the past five years,
esp. when i eased up on the
‘no-launching-from-the-top-bunk-into-the-bouncy-castle’
rule for the boys;
they’re surprisingly safe with that move, anyway.

mil gracias, bouncy castle.

newly-minted five year old jumper

the jumping begins
while waiting in line.

(a note about her outfit:
caroline had chosen the sweetest
partydress for betsyboo.
which b flatly refused.
she actually wanted to wear
her cupcake pajamas.

alas, we coaxed her into
choosing something from
her clothes shelf +
voila,
her self-made birthday outfit +
flowery headband.

c + i held our respective tongues
and praised her for at least
progressing out of nightwear.)

happylaura from her
second floor vantage point;
every little bit we’d hear
that sweetest laughandgiggle
as she watched the Big Girls at play.

stringing birthday necklaces.

angel charlotte

the bride + princess-supergirl

little mister ligh.

thanks, friends, for helping this
delighted five-year-old have
such a special day.

ps -
i loved it at the
after-party when
the jennings + kingston
Big Kids
got to do some
Big Kid Jumping.

it’s a wee bit more exciting
than little girl jumping.

pps -
caroline’s birthdaymorning pancake
in the shape of a ‘c’,
of course.

and the bartender said

henry scored some laughs
with his additions to the
‘99 (blanks) walked into a bar’
game at the after church party in
lisa/julia/carrie’s backyard last night.

the topic
that round =
jeans.

henry’s jokes:

99 sad pairs of jeans
walked into a bar
and the bartender said,
‘why so blue?’

and

99 pairs of jeans
walked into a bar
and the bartender said,
’sorry, guys,
you just don’t fit here.’

choosing goodies to enjoy
with her birthday gift certificate.

thanks, m+j,
what a blast.

she chose a fancy nancy book
and saved the rest of her giftcard for
another trip.

ps -
a word on her white lace gloves:

today was her first official day
of being in Big Church.

so she told me last night
she knew exactly which
dress and shoes she should wear
(read: fancy)
and completed the outfit
with the bow-y headband
and
little white gloves.

of course.

p. 734

on ‘fried eggs’

thank you, mark bittman,
for once again rescuing our meal.

cory’s second morning in a row
for wee-morning-hour mtgs @ work
means we’re itching for
something other than
‘mama’s famous hard boiled’

ps -
my apologies to the spouses
on the other end (singapore + london?)
of c’s call who are holding
dinner (or not holding dinner);
fingers-crossed they’ll be
home soon.

-ish.

soon-ish.

(sometimes i’m a realist)

on surrendering my will

paul miller’s staggering words on
matthew 5, 6 ,and 7:

‘Jesus begins the sermon by telling you he is
going to go through your life and close all of
the doors to human power and glory.

in the beatitudes he says,
‘blessed are the meek for they shall inherit the earth. (matt 5:5)’

in other words, he is saying,
‘give up power in relationships,
and i will show you an entirely different way to do life.
don’t be afraid of being codependent,
of disappearing,
i will take care of you.’

in the rest of ch 5 Jesus closes one door after another.
he tells you to empower your enemies,
those who abuse you,
to think of their needs (5:43-47).

if you suspect someone is irritated with you,
don’t wait for that person to come to you;
go to him or her even if it isn’t your fault. (5:23-24)

Jesus closes the door to revenge,
even revenge through distance (5:38-42).
and when you are selling something, don’t try to
get power over people by using oaths
or promising more than you can deliver (5:33-37).
he closes the door to a secret life of sexual pleasure
by telling you to remove your eye if it is looking
at women to use them (5:27-30).

if you do what Jesus says in ch 5, you start to feel spiritual.

in ch 6, Jesus deals with wanting to look spiritual.

he tells you to keep your prayer life hidden
so you don’t use it to make yourself look good.
if you pray, do it in private (6:5-8).
if you fast, pretend you don’t (6:16-18).
if you give, don’t tell anyone (6:1-4).
don’t use spirituality as a means for getting power and gloy.
Jesus closes the door to getting your identity
from your own righteousness.

then Jesus closes the door to getting your security from money.
instead, he says, give your money away (6:19-24).
now that you’ve lost the security of money,
you begin to panic and say, ‘who’s going to take care of me?’

Jesus says, ‘your Father will. look at the lilies of the field.
seek my Father’s kingdom first.’
so not only do you have to give up money,
but you have to give up worrying about money (6:25-34).
two more doors close to human power and glory.

as you begin ch 7, you have a new view of the world.
you’ve learned how to put God at the center.
everywhere you look, people are so caught up with stuff.

now Jesus taps you on the shoulder and says,
’stop judging. when you see someone else’s sin,
instead of using that information to correct them,
use that information to humble yourself by first
finding the beam in your own eye.’

instead of using your insights into other people’s issues
as a spiritual hammer,
Jesus wants you to take these insights and deepen
your own repentance (7:1-5).

argh! how do i do life?

having closed all your doors,
Jesus opens the door to prayer and
tells you how to get things done (7:7).

he asks for help from his Father.
he talks to his Father and tells him what he wants.

prayer is the positive side of the surrendered will.

as you stop doing your own will and wait for God,
you enter into his mind.

you begin to remain in him,
to abide.

this is the praying life.’

-a praying life, p. 159-160.

separation anxiety

on my part, that is.

i may have just
laminated
a family photo
for caroline’s lunch box today.

over the top?
i think not.

(did i mention
that she’s desperate to go?
can’t-believe-her-good-fortune,
about to skip-out-the-front-door
excited.)

3 precious children in school.
1 sweetlysassypants at home.
my life is shifting.

so i will cling to the
psalms like crazy.

‘the LORD almighty
is with us;
the God of Jacob
is our fortress.’
psalm 46:11

the unmoveable God
in an
uber-moveable world.

yes, i’ll cling.

and i’ll
laminate
while i’m clinging.

re-entry jitters

i have those
we’ve-been-away-for-6-weeks
and-i’m-afraid-i-don’t-remember
how-to-do-Real-Life
jitters
in my stomach.

our plane leaves the
land o’ mountain glory
at 4:30pm
and we kiss the nyc tarmac
at 10:30pm.

(i’m absolutely not worried
about boarding a plane with
four sweet children in tow,
it’s the resuming-normal-life bit
that’s got me apprehensive.)

so i’m going to pray psalm 126 today;
and assume that we were
‘captives’ to vacation…

‘when the Lord brought back
the captives to Zion,
we were like men who dreamed.

our mouthes were filled with laughter,
our tongues with songs of joy.

then it was said among the nations,
‘the Lord has done great things for them.’

the LORD has done great things
for us and
we are filled with joy.’

big ol’ apple,
here we come.

ps -
it’s not every day
i get to take
mulan
shopping
for her first day of kindergarten
back-to-school
supplies.

pps -
bad things happen
when you leave the city.

trader joe’s,
tsk, tsk, tsk.

i feel like we broke up.

trader joe’s abandons uws outpost.

ppps -
maybe i’ll toss a little ps 121
into the ps 126 mix:

that the Lord will watch over
our coming and going
both now and forevermore.

alpine slide

winter park boasts
colorado’s longest alpine slide;
can i get a
whoo-hoo?

spotted from the chair lift
on our various rides
to the top:

1 red fox (caroline + dad)
2 mule deer
several marmots (stinking cute)
chipmunks galore

mom + henry
take in the view.

caroline’s first solo ride.

later, dad and i agreed that
if we had to enter one
family member in a race,
it’d be c.

fearless + speedy, she is.

she’s somehow even faster than henry,
if you can imagine that.

my lift buddy.

[c- on the self-portrait skills]

betsy’s first year
for her Own Slide.

hotdog.

exhibit A. of my
over-the-shoulder
without-turning-around
while-speeding-downhill
mad photography skills.

betsy watches keenly
as i insist that dad
gets his slide-burned elbow
treated properly.

o.u.c.h.

(he might’ve gotten, um,
rammed,
by a certain
very darling but very daring
four-year-old,
and then his slide flipped over.
i’m glad it was only
his elbow.

and, most importantly, that he could
continue sliding.)

grammy on the go.

spot the fox?

climb

cheerful erin from louisiana
gives
betsy from new york
a boost.

there was a 40 min stretch
in the afternoon when
the kids just left their
seat harnesses on
after their climb,

then sat on the bench
and waited for their turn again.

all ready to go.

flip + grin

henry’s record:
15 backflips and
4 frontflips in a row.

my mom,
the human rocket.

mom + nathan
go head to head.

the only time we had to
wait in line was when
the rest of our family were
having their turn;
an ideal day.

betsy was offended
(and teary
and insistent)
that i didn’t have a picture
of her flip.

um,
that’s because you haven’t
exactly learned to flip yet,
sweet three-year-old.

so she took a photo
my dad printed out
tonight of herself
on the tramp
and
turned it
upside
down.

so there.

that’ll show me
not to get a proper
photo of her flip,
imaginary or
otherwise.

just watching him on the gyro
made me feel queasy.

given the amazing no-lines-to-wait-in scenario,
he made a steady circuit
from bungee tramp
to climbing wall
to gyro
to alpine slide,

repeat,
repeat,
repeat.

i couldn’t even get him to
sit down for a proper lunch break,
he stood,
bouncing on tip toe,
and scarfed down two apples
and a pb+h sandwich
and with a hasty,
‘canipleasebeexcused,mom??’

he was off.

ps -
one of my favorite moments
was when the alpine slide
chair lift guy
was scanning nathan + caroline’s
lift tickets,
he said with a grin,

‘are you guys with
henry?’

he certainly made a name for himself.

mary jane

one of the hilights of our entire year,
our winter park trip.

i remember our first time up
the ski lift with the girls;
they were 1 and 2 yrs old,
sitting on either side of me,
smiling their heads off
while i worried that maybe
we were up too high?

now, at a wisened 3 + 4 yrs respectively,
they
run
for the chair lift.

run.

and i run, too.

dreamy.
(and the teeniest bit scary)

henry + grammy,
followed by
nathan, betsy + papa.

my mostly companion.

12,000 ft.

snow mountain ranch

we celebrated the kids
upcoming fall birthdays
around a campfire.

my favorite part was
watching daddy + caroline
bump dora-the-explorer rings
and shout,
‘powergirls!’

dad,
you’ll always be my
favorite
powergirl.

so sad about the missing trees.

they’ve been superaggressive about
harvesting the rotting trees from
the pine beetle devastation here;
they’re stacked in massive, forlorn piles.

and on a hopeful note,
little pink flags dot the landscape
where they’ve planted
the new trees.

sunrise.

painting, part 2

we revisited our painting spot
for the final additions to our
landscapes.

inhale.
exhale.

horsetooth, revisited

boulder-climbing
begins at sunrise.

raise your hand
if you’ve had a
camper’s pie before.

or just show me that
satisfied smile.

good things

things i love:

1. this awesomely goofy game, bohnanza.
(aka. the bean game)

a game a night
is our vacation rx.

2. ian frazier.

did you read the second part of
the siberia article in the new yorker?

i was laughing out loud.

and why haven’t i read his
full-length books before?

quadruple-whammy

you know that sweet tension between
having a deliriously refreshing time
away from home
and
being homesick?

we’re right on that sweet
tightwire.

and driving thru these
mountain-curvy
heart-poundy
roads
listening to redeemer tapes,

i was hit with a huge wave
of longing as i heard
this perfect storm of
beloved voices
talking to me from
the car’s speakers…

side 1:
scripture reader – mindy
preacher – tuck

side 2:
scripture reader – michelle
preacher – tim

it’s enough to make
this grown girl cry.

now,
back to drinking in
these deliciously refreshing
mountain views.